Oh man.

The changes keep on coming. Some good, some not. Ben's been doing well. We're going to regular therapy so we don't lose each other and so that he can get things under control. He went to church with me on Sunday. And then Wednesday he got a call from a gentleman he met nearly a year ago asking him to interview for a job. We met this guy a the dog track of all places! lol But he and Ben hit it off really well and at that time the guy asked Ben for his resume. Ben doesn't want to stay in the Navy. He just has lost his passion. He's miserable there. So take it for what it is, but this interview made Ben feel like a million bucks. And that's really important to him. He was so proud of himself. So we'll see where that goes.
Yesterday was a rough day though. It was Dane's last day of his current daycare. He's been there since he was 8 months old. I had a little party for his little friends and we gave his teachers gifts. I was tearing up as we left though. He doesn't understand that he'll be changing schools. I've tried to explain to him but I don't think he grasps it. This morning he stayed home with Ben because he's got to get his 2 year shots. Poor guy. Anyway as I walked out the door he said, "No, mommy. Shoes on. I go to school!" And he cried and cried. It broke my heart.
And then on a final note- my Grandpa passed away yesterday. God he was hurting so bad. The cancer just hit him like a ton of bricks. The last time I saw him he was still running and working so hard. And then this. My Dad and sister Jessica went to see him last week when they got the news this would be his last week. They said it was pretty bad. My Dad who hasn't spoken with his Dad in so many long years went to say his goodbyes. It was a beautiful goodbye actually. The kind that a man who doesn't show emotion is okay with. My Dad and Grandpa talked very small talk and when my Dad complimented my Grandpa on his new house. My Grandpa said,
" Well a friends son helped me. He was real big and strong. I couldn't do it on my own."
And the last thing my Dad said to his Dad- was,
"Well Dad. That's how I remember you. Big and strong."
And then he squeezed his shoulder and that was it.
My Grandpa died November 1st- but not in the way the Dr's expected. Since he was a runner, he had a very strong heart. It was pounding so hard in these last weeks and all the Dr's thought he would most certainly die of a heart attack. But yesterday Grandpa asked my Grandma to put on some old 50's music- probably the music that made him happiest, reminded him of being young. And he fell asleep. And he never woke up.